Journal 2 - Why Papa

I see my family as complete and happy. My papa is a soldier and my mama is a housewife. I have an older brother he graduated geodetic engineering. We are united and we love each other so much... before..

March 25, 2019 I confronted my papa because he is having an affair with other woman. He is hurting my mama.. all of us. He did call the girl in front of us. I am really hurt.. so much!!! and so my mom. I didn't expect it will come to our family.. He decided to choose the mistress instead of us. As I am writing this I am literally crying. I really write this journal with all my heart. 3 months since I've discovered he is having an affair but I didn't tell it to mama. Until mama discovered it by herself. Today my papa and me argued each other. He shouted to me and I shouted to him. I don't know him anymore. I tell everything what's in my heart about him. The pain I am carrying right now. But still his decision is firm.. He can't leave the girl...... I don't know my emotions right now. I am hurt, I am mad at him, and I want to forgive him because it is the will of the Lord... I'll just surrender it to God.

I love my  family so much. But I'll just trust the Lord right now. I know there will be a better future prepared for me. I am praying for a family restoration.